https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uf8bt6fGQyA - Where does idea talk therapy is best comes from - Historically - majority of talk-therapy patients were women (60-70%) today.  = Potentially biasing data towards women. - 60-70% of therapists today are women. - APA Guidance for Boys/Men point out a systemic bias in the way we diagnose men/women - Depression/Anxiety diagnoses require "feelings" and articulation. - https://www.apa.org/about/policy/boys-men-practice-guidelines.pdf - Men are often diagnosed with externalising disorders (addiction, ASPD, sociopathy). - Male feelings often externalised. - For men: "an emotion is a problem to be solved, not talked about. - Socially: Men are often expected to "fix the problem". - Male reluctance to engage in couple counselling (M-F) - Why (according to research): Feel outgunned in therapy. That if they go to a couples counsellor their partner could make their case better. - When the therapist talks them - feel as if they are unable to effectively communicate. - Analogy (as if one person is a lawyer, the other one isn't - in a court of law). - How men communicate differently - EG: A negative expression of a positive affection.  If we like someone, we don't say that, we will "dog them" about it. - Will not say: "I'm proud of you", will say "bro, you're whipped". - Physicality - Men are often very physical with how they express things (rather than intellectual). EG: "It felt like she ripped my heart out / stomped on my balls". - Emotions have physical implications. - EG: Anxiety = changes in blood flow; increased heart-rate/breathing. - Anecdotally: Physical component / expressions seems stronger for men than women. - Anecdotally: Men need hugs more than women. - Resolution - Still seek psychotherapy if MH challenges, it's still the best solution we have. - Psychotherapy still equally effective for men + women. - Suggestion: See at least three psychotherapists before giving up. A lot of psychotherapy about fit. - Normative Male Alexithymiab : Idea it's normative for men to not feel their emotions. #Men